OKAY So tell me why I am 27 years old and I have severe back pain? I am getting old. I made these cute little tiles with sayings on them with the young women yesterday and I was bent over helping them for a couple of hours and now I can't freaking move....I am in pain. I had a great day today learning about my family. I never knew how much fun finding your dead ancestors can be. I also learned about my Dads side of the family how they survived back in the 1920's and all through the great depression. I am loving it! I am so glad my grandmother made two books full of the heritage of the weenig side. Great. I met with a young woman in my church the other day who recently lost her father. She cried and talked about how wonderful he was and how it literally pulled the rug out from under her. I cant believe how much I have taken my Dad's life for grantid. I am so jealous of family and friends who have a wonderful relationship with their dads. I WANT THAT. I wish so much that my dad would be my dad again. It is so hard to see him choose his wife over us kids. I hate that the divorce pulled him so far away. Yes, I am saying this on my freaking blog......its the way I truly feel. This is kind of theraputic in that I know that there isnt a big audience listening but it motivates me to write and get out all of the junk in my head and my heart. I hate that I cant just pick up the phone and talk to him for hours. It hurts to think of the fun times when he could have been here and has chosen not to. Anyway enough of that for tonight. Just letting go and moving on.............I wish it was that easy.
Que le vaya bien gnite y'all
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2 comments:
Lori...I'm struggling with back pain too! Benton is going through that attached phase where I have to hold him ALL the time.
Thanks for sharing about your dad! I know we've had many conversations about this before. Get it all out girl! I think we all want to be wanted and to have great relationships. Especially with family. I know how much you want your dad to be a bigger part of your life. I really admire you though for making the effort to see him and let Kaylee know her grandpa. You are amazing! I love you! you give me animo!
All I gotta say is you're funny! I love how you just lay it all out there. He made some really and I mean really bad choices and now your are the ones paying the consequences, it sucks! Don't give up on him though, one day he will realize it and ask your forgiveness, so be preparing yourself. My dad breaks my heart every time he breaks the word of wisdom or decides he doesn't want to do what it takes to be an eternal family. I love him so much and wish that was enough. Anyway, your posts are awesome! I am counting down the days to seeing you! By the way, the pic of you at Leslie's wedding, you look hot! :) And I love the one with you and Kaylee, it is so sweet.
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